Up late

I’m up late again, can’t sleep. I probably could if I really tried, but there’s something about the stillness of the hour and the silence that surrounds me that brings me peace. I think it’s a form of meditation, this up late reading and writing stuff, which is good because meditation is supposed to be relaxing.

I’m thinking about starting up a meditation routine for the health benefits. I was into it a few years ago, and I found it to be beneficial for the stress levels. Trouble is, life got so stressful there for a while, it was hard to find the time or the headspace just to ‘be’ without feeling like I needed to be getting something done, and feeling guilty if I wasn’t. Therein lies the trouble, I think.

I have come the full circle of late, and would like to become a little more ‘mindful’ once again. So I am preparing my ‘space’ once again in a more concerted effort to acquire some of that calm that only shows up when I really concentrate. It shouldn’t be that way. Calm should come naturally, shouldn’t it? Or is it a learned skill, like the many other skills that we acquire through our life’s journey?

From the books that I have read, and I’ve read a few, I should be an expert on calm, peace and mindfulness. But I guess it’s more than reading a book, although I can tell you all about the benefits of inner peace without having actually experienced it long-term myself.

I’ve even bought myself a dvd on yoga. Here’s hoping that I can stick with that long enough to earn some benefits. The last time I tried yoga I was exhausted, and my muscles ached from being contorted in ways that they haven’t moved since I was a supple, flexible and energetic six year old.

My plan for the next few months is to get into a routine of meditation, yoga and looking after myself.  If you are raising your eyeballs to the ceiling right about now, you won’t be the only one. I will let you know how I go.


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